April 10, 2015

Madonna does a standup comedy routine... and the jokes are all about dating younger men.

One joke is that, needing a date, she asked her son: "Do you have any friends you could introduce me to?" Her son is 14. She's 56.



It's supposed to be funny — not that it needs to be funny (the joke is that she's doing a standup routine at all) — because we're supposed to think good for you when a woman gets a man (or boy) who is younger.

Or maybe the idea was to make the audience boo and hiss, that it was a Neil Hamburger-type routine. Well, no one seems to have gotten it on that level. You have to sell intentionally, painfully bad. It's not easy.

87 comments:

Gahrie said...

Yeah..it would just be creepy if a man did a similar routine.

Michael K said...

Is she still alive ?

The Godfather said...

Give her a break. She's already past her sell-by date as a sex symbol. She's got to do something until she's ready for the home.

I recommend that she broaden her act by doing impressions. That's always good for some laughs.

But she ought to lose the art jokes. Too small an audience.

n.n said...

Pedophilia is another orientation and behavior. Either Madonna is anxious that progressive morality requires its normalization on principle or she is eagerly previewing the next trans-equality movement.

Wince said...

Did she have spinach in her teeth?

Or was that "bling" in her "grill"?

Mary Beth said...

The thing about no one making any money from her tours was kind of funny.

viator said...

A number of female school teachers are way ahead of her.

MathMom said...

Too boring to finish listening to her. Gah.

Sydney said...

Do you suppose she feels comfortable dressed like that, or does she hurry home to change into something normal?

Big Mike said...

I don't think she should quit her day job.

averagejoe said...

Um, so, um, um, what's a word that means worse than terrible? Um..., and uh, um, what's with the 80's skank look? Um, like uh, the 80's called, they want their skank back... um, um, um, uh, so, uh, um, so like, um, is uh, Caroline Kennedy you're speech coach? Um, um, uh, so uh, um, so uh, it's like, uh, hard to believe that uh, um, this person has uh, um, been performing and speaking before audiences for like, um, uh, uh, 35 years...um, um.

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

People here regularly ask why Althouse is considered a conservative blogger by the rest of the world. There are two reasons: the vast majority of the commentators are conservative and she panders constantly to those commentators. The perfect example is the lack of a post on the murder of Walter Scott. No point challenging the punters with grim reality.

YoungHegelian said...

@ARM,

I'm not sure what's controversial (as opposed to simply awful) about the murder of Walter Scott.

The video evidence came to light, the officer was soon arrested, and was charged with murder. A judge & jury will now decide his fate.

Have you found anyone on the right who thinks this is a bad way to handle things? Or, are you trying to say without saying it, that because this seems to be a case of a cop gone bad the other more recent examples were therefore, in spite of evidence to the contrary, cops gone bad?

I fail to see how "deciding each case on the evidence" is liberal or conservative. It just seems to be justice.

William said...

A professional comedian would kill with such material. Think how funny Woody Allen would be if he had made the same jokes. It's all about timing........You can say Madonna a has been, but so are her fans. They're going to follow her to her grave. She's nowhere near as geriatric as the Rolling Stones, and their fans still turn out.......Female singers have a second life. After they get fat and/or wrinkly, they can sing sad songs of love lost and wasted moments to great effect. Rosemary Clooney, Marianne Faithful, Sinead O'Connor and Barbara Cook were more moving and appealing singers after they lost their looks. Madonna, like Mick Jagger, is going the ageless sex symbol route. Be interesting to see how long she can pull it off.

DanTheMan said...

ARM
I'm very conservative.
I'm a former police officer
From the evidence I've seen, Officer Slager murdered Walter Scott.

I suspect the reason our hostess hasn't posted this as a topic is that there is very little to discuss, not out of deference to her conservative posters.

Peter said...

"lack of a post on the murder of Walter Scott.

Scott was arrested promptly, and I have heard zero voices supporting what he did.

Which is to say, if you respond to facts (rather than the narratives overlayed over them) then it's a near certainty you'll conclude that of Walter Scott was not the same as the death of Michael Brown, in that one shooting was justified and the other almost surely was not.


In any case, "one swallow does not a summer make." If you saw a video in which a black thug viciously attacked a non-black person for reasons other than self-defense, would you try to draw a moralistic, racialist narrative from that? If not, why would you do so from the death of Walter Scott?

I don't know anyone who disputes that there are bad cops, including some very bad ones. Just as I don't know anyone who disputes that there are some bad thugs (yes, even black ones) including some very bad ones. An instance, even several instances, cannot simply be expanded into a general case without lots more supporting evidence.

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

Peter said...
Scott was arrested promptly,


No there was a cover up, which was subsequently revealed by the video tape. Without the tape he would not have been arrested.

averagejoe said...

Does botox widen the gaps in teeth, or is she just wearing David Letterman's dentures for a gag?

Guildofcannonballs said...

Is 14 prepubescent? My recollection is by 14 years of age I was no longer prepubescent, hence had I been raped by an adult I could have killed the rapist and probably would have had to have standed (withstood) trial as an adult. Wearing pants and whatnot.

But what if ARM wants to speak of trolling ways? Could we not receive a small rhyme to make the trolling more palatable?

Oh screw it, yeah conservatives think this and that and that other thing therefore Jim Carrey Fire Marshal Bill politics prevails.

For the retarded.

YoungHegelian said...

@ARM,

No there was a cover up, which was subsequently revealed by the video tape

No. "Evidence that has not yet come to light" does not equal a cover-up. Scott was murdered on Saturday & Off. Slater was charged with murder on Tuesday. Pretty damn short lived cover-up.

The guilty party lying about his crime but soon being discovered is not considered a "cover-up"

chickelit said...

Madonna's fighting a relevancy battle with Lady Gaga and losing badly. The reason? Talent

She needs to just dry up and blow away.

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

Clearly the police, based on their official statements to the press, had no intention of doing anything before the tape appeared. No tape, no action. It was short-lived unsuccessful cover up, but a cover up nonetheless.


Curious George said...

"AReasonableMan said...
Peter said...
Scott was arrested promptly,

No there was a cover up, which was subsequently revealed by the video tape. Without the tape he would not have been arrested."

I'm a conservative. It was murder.

You're contention is idiotic.

DanTheMan said...

>>Clearly the police, based on their official statements to the press, had no intention of doing anything before the tape appeared. No tape, no action. It was short-lived unsuccessful cover up, but a cover up nonetheless

You know this... how?

madAsHell said...

Who knew?? You can't lip synch comedy.

YoungHegelian said...

@chicklit,

Madonna's fighting a relevancy battle with Lady Gaga and losing badly.

Aside from her recent performances of the old standards, for which I applaud her, GaGa was slipping, too.

It's really tough to stay relevant in popular music. People just get chewed up & spit out. My favorite example --- Cindi Lauper. Four number one songs off of her first album, a feat accomplished up to then only by the Beatles. Her next album's a dud, and ---boom--- she's working with wrestlers.

FullMoon said...

madonna did an act of being an un-funny comedienne.
I say she pulled it off, in a Rupert Pupkin sort of way.



Gahrie said...

lack of a post on the murder of Walter Scott.

You mean the case where everything went right, from the cop getting fired and charged with murder, no bail; to the family of the victim telling Sharpton to stay away?

What's there to say?

Ann Althouse said...

"I'm not sure what's controversial (as opposed to simply awful) about the murder of Walter Scott."

That's about right. What is the issue to be discussed?

Gahrie said...

Her next album's a dud, and ---boom--- she's working with wrestlers.

She's was working with wrestklers before her first album...that's why Captain Lou played her dad in the music videos.

Ann Althouse said...

This blog isn't a news feed. The absence of a post only means that I have nothing to say, not that I don't care or haven't noticed. This kind of criticism of the blog is something I got sick of more than 10 years ago. I used to let it bother me... 10 years ago. So if that's all you've got, you don't get this blog.

Gahrie said...

Without the tape he would not have been arrested.

Quick ARM..what are these week's Powerball numbers...i'll split the take with you.

Man you should have said something about seeing the future earlier..we could have bet on the Superbowl and March Madness.

Gahrie said...

Somebody needs to call Daily Kos and tell them to get somebody up in the bullpen. Both ARM and Garage have been off thier game lately, and neither one seems to have their heart in it anymore. I think they're both done, bring in a couple of relief posters.

Quaestor said...

Michael K. wrote: Is she still alive ?

Technically yes. Undead is more accurate.

FullMoon said...

Ya know, ARM casts a bait comment and reels in numerous small fry and several heavyweights, including (amazingly) AA herownself.

He succeeds every single time.

He is definitely smiling, if not laughing out loud.


Bob said...

She has to wear a jacket to cover those sinewy, chimpanzee-like arms. Were you to make love to her you'd be hard pressed to escape the Chimpanzee Death Lock she'd apply when she climaxed.

Quaestor said...

ARM casts a bait comment and reels in numerous small fry and several heavyweights, including (amazingly) AA herownself.

So many than one might say that instead of trolling, ARM trawls.

Curious George said...

"FullMoon said...
Ya know, ARM casts a bait comment and reels in numerous small fry and several heavyweights, including (amazingly) AA herownself.

He succeeds every single time.

He is definitely smiling, if not laughing out loud. "

Nope. He really thinks he has a gotcha.

Quaestor said...

Chimpanzee Death Grip? Is that anything like...?

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

DanTheMan said...
You know this... how?


One simple piece of evidence is that officers at the scene told an internal report that they gave Scott CPR. The video clearly shows that they did not do this. This collusion, or closing of ranks, lies at the core of the fraying of the police-citizen relationship. Their loyalty is to each other rather than to the public. It is the mentality of an occupying force, not keepers of the peace.

Quaestor said...

The sinewy arms aren't half as obnoxious as that little theater received standard accent she affects from time to time. Perhaps Madonna is prepping a follow-on career as the 21st century Margaret Rutherford?

Bob said...

More like this.

Gahrie said...

Their loyalty is to each other rather than to the public. It is the mentality of an occupying force, not keepers of the peace..

You didn't play any team sports growing up, did you?

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

Ann Althouse said...
What is the issue to be discussed?


How prevalent is this behavior?

What can be done to minimize it?

How readily should we trust police testimony?

When did police safety become the paramount concern of an institution that at least nominally was designed to protect the public from harm?

And, this still leaves out a key issue raised by the Ferguson case, of how readily small town police forces become focused on preying on the public for their revenue support rather than making the community a safer and more pleasant place to live.

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

Gahrie said...
You didn't play any team sports growing up, did you?


I did and a few kids I played with became cops. I doubt that the ethical principles that we followed as teenagers would have served them very well after they joined the force.

I understand the mentality, I just don't believe that it should make a significant contribution to a well paid professional unit. They are not soldiers, they are public servants. They perform a difficult task, but so do a lot of other people.

Bob Ellison said...

Nice hair.

Quaestor said...

It seems to me that there are basically two kinds of comedians, the wits and the provocateurs.

Wits are funny almost by nature. Their comedy grows spontaneously from superior intelligence, phenomenal memory, and a gift for mimicry, word play, or both. The wit needs only stimulation -- an occurrence, a fleeting comment, a conjunction of topics or parallels -- and the wit flows as if as reflexive. Wits are rare. They hardly need prepared material or writers. A wit needs only an audience.

Provocateurs rely on shock. Rarely the shock come in a gentle form such as the repartee of the late Hennie Youngman. What was shocking was the boldness of his rapid fire use of stale jokes. Audiences laughed more at the audacity than the jokes. Lenny Bruce pioneered the modern provocateur by coupling Youngman's audacity to indelicate and occasionally repellant subjects. Unfortunately for the comedy of manners in American culture since WWII the provocateur style has become dominate, primarily because the provocateur needs only charisma -- stage presence to succeed; the rest, i.e. the actual patter, can be bought cheaply, or even stolen.

Madonna is a provocateur, and a rather cheap one at that.

The Godfather said...

8 bullets in Scott's back and the shooter wouldn't have been charged if there had 't been a video? Not plausible.

Laslo Spatula said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Laslo Spatula said...

I slept with Madonna when she still had her Original Vagina. Dennis Rodman kept trying to lick my feet.

Dude.

I am Laslo.

Quaestor said...

Bob wrote: More like this.

Indian death lock? What the hell is that? Did Mahatma Ghandi use the Indian death lock on Mountbatten?

Everybody knows wrestling is fake, whereas the Vulcan death grip is real and deadly.

tim in vermont said...

Men in shorts? How about women past 50 in fishnet stockings? OMG.

I was a fan when she first came out. I stuck up for her when other guys said she was ugly. I said, "maybe so, but she has a certain style and air." But now? Lose the "sex symbol" clothes. She reminds me of that time the superannuated members of Kiss performed, one of them wearing pants that were slit on the side and sewed in spots to reveal a lot of leg, leg that looked a lot better thirty years ago.

Quaestor said...

Superannuated... a well-chosen word, Tim. When I think about the definitive analysis of Madonna's career the image of Sisyphus struggling against superannuation suggests itself.

Fen said...

"The perfect example is the lack of a post on the murder of Walter Scott. No point challenging the punters with grim reality."

What grim reality? The available evidence makes it look like a bad shooting. Although it does appear he attack the police officer.

If he hadn't resisted arrest, he would be alive today.

Oh wait, you want to racialize the shooting don't you?

rcocean said...

There are a million blogs on the internet covering the Walter Scott shooting.

Why do idiots always expect every single blog to cover a news story?

rcocean said...

It reminds me of the old days when some breaking new story would be covered by Abc/cbs/nbc/pbs/Cnn and then some moron would complain because Independent Channel 12 was showing a movie.

Quaestor said...

I'd like to conduct a little impromptu survey. Give a look to two iconic images and judge which is the more sexy. This or this?

It's my contention that Madonna hasn't the first clue about sex other than the mere mechanics. If it is possible to be sexually tone-deaf, then Madonna is a paradigm case.

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

Ann Althouse said...
This kind of criticism of the blog is something I got sick of more than 10 years ago.

I am not criticizing I am explaining to the punters why it is not completely unreasonable to view this as a 'conservative' blog. I have no dog in this particular fight. I like 'conservative' blogs.

rcocean said...

Just retire. Talk about not quitting while you're ahead.

FullMoon said...

Fen
Rcocean
CG
I said, "....every single time"

Wince said...

Likewise, one might ask why ARM -- a liberal commenter asserting there was a cover-up -- doesn't mention the first backup officer who arrived in time to see Slager plant the taser next to Walter Scott's body was black.

The suspicion might be people on the left don't want to harsh the racial narrative.

rcocean said...

What's interesting about the walter scott shooting? Its an open and shut case unless we hear something new.

Boring.

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

EDH said...
The suspicion might be people on the left don't want to harsh the racial narrative.


As a moderate, one question I often ask myself is why do people here bring up race so quickly, when there is no apparent need?

chickelit said...

AReasonableMan said...

As a moderator, one question I often ask myself is why do people here bring up race so quickly, when there is no apparent need?

FTFY

Paul said...

Lately alot of female teachers seem to be 'dating' 14 to 16 year old students.

Wonder if "Little Nonni" Madonna got the idea from them? Looks like it's 16 where she is. So maybe she wasn't joking.

Fen said...

ARM: As a moderate, one question I often ask myself is why do people here bring up race so quickly, when there is no apparent need?

You're just frustrated. You need to call people racists to boost your self-esteem, and Althouse is not co-operating.

That's Crack's job here anyway. Why are you trying to take away a black man's job? You must be racist.

Kirk Parker said...

Quastor,

Neither.

Ummmmm....

I mean.....

Neither NEITHER NEITHER!

Paco Wové said...

"two iconic images"

Should have posted a trigger warning before that first one, Q.

Col Mustard said...

14 Might be pushing it... but what's comedy if not outrageous? Most laughs start as a gasp... Did he really say that???

On another note, what's with piling-on old people? If a woman consorted with a person of a different race, religion, ethnicity, sex (oops, make that same sex) would anyone dare refer to that as "creepy"?

FWIW, I've been in a COMPLETELY monogamous relationship with a woman nearly as old as me for over 20 years. Not sayin' I didn't have some good times with teenagers before... I'm 72, now :-)

Truthfully, would you rather your 19 year-old daughter went out with a man who treated her (respectfully) as an adult or the kid down the street who had access to good weed and told her how great she'd look with a tattoo on her neck?

rcocean said...

ARM is about as "moderate" as Hillary Clinton.

Yes, he's just looking for someone to call a "raciss" - makes him feel good.

Bay Area Guy said...

Re Madonna - the woman achieved everything she possibly could have wanted out of life: immense fame, millions of dollars, numerous lovers, numerous mansions, children, husbands, diamonds, hit records, hit movies, and yet, at age 56, she's still playing the sex card and still awkwardly grasping for relevance. The Material Girl may still be living in a material world, but boy does it seem bleak.

Re Scott shooting - looks like a tragic event. But the Left's current mission is to use tragic events to foment upheaval, unrest, riots, violence for the purpose of redistributing power from those who have it to those who don't. We've seen this movie before.

JAORE said...

"He looked at me with shock and disgust and dismay..."

And not for the first time, I'd wager.

Laslo Spatula said...

Col Mustard said...

"Truthfully, would you rather your 19 year-old daughter went out with a man who treated her (respectfully) as an adult or the kid down the street who had access to good weed and told her how great she'd look with a tattoo on her neck?"

I think this is a spectacularly astute observation.

I don't even have a problem with the parenthetical "respectfully", as long as it is understood to be parenthetical.

Of course, 19 might be a year too old, but they are only as young as they feel. What I've learned, at least.

I am Laslo.

Beloved Commenter AReasonableMan said...

rcocean said...
Yes, he's just looking for someone to call a "raciss" - makes him feel good.


I find this obsession with race a very peculiar thing.

Laslo Spatula said...

If I show up at a 19 year-old girl's place to pick her up I like to drive my 1969 Mustang.

The Van sometimes makes the parents nervous.

Also, the 1969 Mustang gives me and the Father something to chat about while we avoid acknowledging what will likely transpire between me and the daughter.

I'll let them look at the engine, but definitely not in the trunk.

I am Laslo.

Laslo Spatula said...

Sometimes it is just easier to pick them up at the High School.

Especially if they are still wearing their Cheerleader outfit: I love Pep Rally days.

I am Laslo.

Laslo Spatula said...

One of the few things between me and My Dream?

A teaching credential.


I am Laslo.

SGT Ted said...

Waiting on what the local and Federal investigation uncovers, rather than speculation based on the "cops are racist thugs" narrative seems like a good way to do business.

You know, that whole innocent until proven guilty thing.

JD said...

Madonna's ancient dating life is so much more important than police that are using deadly force in excess on black Americans.

Gahrie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gahrie said...

Madonna's ancient dating life is so much more important than police that are using deadly force in excess on black Americans.

The only thing the SC case had in common with all of the other incidents was yet again a Black man failed to comply with the lawful orders of the police, resisted, and was killed.

None of these incidents would have happened if black children were raised to behave and follow the law.

Paul said...

Sorry Gahrie,

Failure to obey the law does not get one the automatic (no pun intended) death penalty.

Only Nazi Germany in WWII ended up making everything punishable by death.

And I say that being a conservative law-and-order type.

The ex-cop will either get death himself or a real unhappy life in prison as a ex-cop lifer whom every gang in prison hates.

Paul said...

And LindaH,

The cop was not using 'excessive force'. He snapped and MURDERED him.

He is not charged with excessive force.... But murder.

With maybe a million cops in the US there will be cases of excessive force, ignorant cops, bullies, and yes, even a few racist.

Quaestor said...

Regarding my "This or this" survey...

Bob Ellison complimented Madonna's hair do (damning with faint praise, I suppose), which prompted me to Google recent images of her performing in fishnet stockings. I was impressed by how her hair was styled -- very long, parted across the crown to closely frame her face -- it was so familiar. Then it struck me, Morticia!

Angelica Houston's interpretation of the character was I think closer to Charles Addam's original ruined beauty, whereas Carolyn Jones, perhaps because the TV sitcom version was so lighthearted, performed her Morticia more alluringly, almost sweetly. Even though her sheath dress showed only a hint of décolletage, the Carolyn Jones Morticia was the most overtly sexual sitcom mother of the 1960's.

I concluded that at least subconsciously Madonna's latest stage persona is inspired by the Morticia Addam's character, except bottle-blond rather than raven's wing, and sexually maladroit rather than seductive.

bbkingfish said...

Madonna never has been accused of lacking guts. Now, talent...?

Bad Lieutenant said...

ARM, I'll throw you a bone. Granting that the supreme court may act stupidly, why would it be unconstitutional or a bad idea to shoot a fleeing suspect? It seems a good opportunity to dispose of negative people without the tedium and expense of trial. Think of it as trial by footrace.

Of course I also want corporal punishment to make a comeback. My bitfeed just told me of a HORSE chase out in the desert, which ended in a righteous beatdown (sadly, filmed from a helicopter) of some career lowlife, whose offenses include the shooting of a family pet, a puppy, in the presence of family members. How excellent that he be beaten.

Why do some people want to be so nice to criminals?