November 11, 2015

Who would you pick if you had to spend the day with one of the presidential candidates?

I'd rather say no to the whole thing, but let's assume you have to choose. I realize that all of them would be either boring or annoying and some would be both.

101 comments:

Michael K said...

Carson in an instant.

Rob said...

Easy. Hillary, in the hope that during the day she might get it on with Huma, for some hot girl-on-girl action.

Patrick said...

That would NOT be hot, Rob

Laslo Spatula said...

Am I held back at arm's length by sycophants and Secret Service for the day or do I actually get the day to converse with them with no intervention?

Because if it is the latter I choose Hillary.

I would hope that after a day's useful conversation between us she would commit suicide.

Especially if she really believes I have Chelsea in the Van.

I am Laslo.


Laslo Spatula said...

If I did have Chelsea in the Van I'm not exactly sure what I would do with her.

She is no longer Fresh Meat.

I am Laslo.

Laslo Spatula said...

Maybe I could find some cool dudes in another White Van with No Windows and make a trade.

Chelsea should be good for at least four cheerleaders, if only for ransom.

But no one is ever in the back of a White Van with No Windows for ransom.

I am Laslo.

rsbsail said...

This is not an entirely fair question, as there are few people who are in the public eye that I would choose to spend a day.

Laslo Spatula said...

There is little worse than kidnapping a girl -- like Chelsea, say -- that no one wants to fuck.

Trade Value = Zero.

I mean, Huma might see the PR Value and toss in a carton of cigarettes, but that's only if she can give Chelsea to her male family members in the Muslim Brotherhood.

Okay, maybe only a half-carton of cigarettes.

But they better be American, not that Vietnamese knock-off shit.

I am Laslo.

Unknown said...

Hands down trump

Anonymous said...

I would like Ted Cruz to get the nomination. He thinks on his feet well and he can actually go on the Caliphate News Network and win the exchange. He's hard to like and his voice grates. But I feel Cruz has (conservative) core beliefs and principles that inform his actions, and I think he's plenty tough.

Laslo Spatula said...

For Republicans I would choose Rand Paul.

Because Libertarians always have the Best Porn.

I bet , at one point, he had a Van.

Or at least his Dad.

I am Laslo.

MAJMike said...

Ted Cruz

Wince said...

Can we roll our eyes like Mick Jagger when he sang "Let's Spend Some Time Together" on the Ed Sullivan Show?

madAsHell said...

I am Laslo.

I'm seeing black helicopters launching from Boeing field, and heading north-east.
Now would be a good time to change your usual routine.

traditionalguy said...

Trump seems to know US military history and I BET he could keep up in any discussion. And I expect he would never let up until he found the operative facts that wins the point.

Iron sharpens iron.

And I am sure he would be the perfect host. The Hospitality industry is a wonderful set of skills to master for political party growth.

Derp said...

Donald Trump. Easy. I am not sure I would vote for him, certainly not in the primary, but he has the most cool stuff, and none of them seem interesting on their own.

Meade said...

I'd spend a day with Bernie. Hiking, biking. Maybe paddling. His grandkids could come with us. I'm sure they're fun. I wonder if they have a dog. A Newfie perhaps?

readering said...

Hillary, because it would hopefully mean hanging out with Bill. Although I support Martin O'Malley, he and spouse Katie don't seem as interesting as Bill.

rcocean said...

You've gotta be kidding! Trump of course. Love or hate him, he's Yuge!

Oh wait, on second thought i'd rather listen to boring stories about mailmen and how Jesus loves Lehman brothers and illegal aliens - so it's Kasich.

madAsHell said...

Trump. Because he appears to be more spontaneous than the rest, and he doesn't care about hurting feelings.

Barry Dauphin said...

Trump... you'd get into all the best places and probably take a ride in his helicopter. But spending the day with and spending four years with as president are entirely different things.

Henry said...

Does Rubio still own his fishing boat? That could kill a day easy. Rand Paul seems the one who might actually be interesting to talk politics with, off the record.

But the best day would be to hang out with Jeb at George's ranch and talk painting with George. Laura is a beautiful person. Jeb can go soak in the irrigation ditch.

gspencer said...

Trump hands down!

Drago said...

traditionalguy: "Trump seems to know US military history..."

What is this observation based upon precisely?

richlb said...

I think Christie would be a great guy to spend the day with. He certainly would make for some interesting discussions.

Real American said...

Hillary, and only if Bill was there and only for the underage hookers. And Hillary couldn't be there.

john said...

I would pick suicide.

Smilin' Jack said...

"Who would you pick if you had to spend the day with one of the presidential candidates?"

Is that a 24 hour day or just daytime? Cuz in daylight they're all boring, but at night Trump could get you into the VIP room at one of those Manhattan clubs with wall-to-wall supermodels.

Anonymous said...

Carson in an instant.

phantommut said...

Club crawl with Paul, maybe in Memphis, maybe in Nashville. Easy.

Etienne said...

Ms. Fiorina. She was born the same year I was. We've seen the same carnival, her from the top, me from the bottom.

I'd like to get her thoughts on remaking the American economy. My own view is that the IRS is obsolete. We need to stop taxing wages and start taxing consumption.

If she were unable to get rid of the IRS, I think a second tactic would be to remove the top 10% of its management. These are all Democrats, and would never be on her team.

She could pledge to remove them and put them in jail, or that they could go to their local sheriff and turn themselves in. Either way, they all need to be in prison.

Once you get rid of the IRS, then you need a way to fund the government. In this regard, the best way is a VAT. I figure 25% tax until we get the debt down to $1 trillion, and then 15% until we fund the unfunded liabilities, and then drop it to 10% and let it float from there. 1% on a good year, 12% on a bad year.

Congress and the courts can make a constitutional law, or they could amend it.

Carly seems like the most receptive to a capitalist regime. In 8 years she could get a lot done.

Then I'd advise her on hairstyle. That Lois Griffin thing isn't attractive.

Tank said...

Trump for sure.

Second choice ... Sanders.

We're talking entertainment!

J. Farmer said...

I'd pick any of the so called hawks (basically all of them) and try desperately to convince them how foolish, wrong-headed, and self-defeating their policies were.

Amexpat said...

Bernie. He reminds me of a generation of my relatives who have passed on.

rcocean said...

"I think Christie would be a great guy to spend the day with."

Do you like the "Boss"? Because Christie has gone to like 150 Bruce Springsteen concerts and he cried when BS agreed to meet with him.

Honestly, I'd rather be dropped off a Bridge.

Quinn Satterwaite said...

Frankly I disagree with the Althouse premise- I think they'd all be fine hangs. With the exception of Hillary where I cant imagine there is any agreeable or enjoyable going on, except that she is a drinker. So if we can just throw on a day drunk while she avoids talking it might work. Maybe at some point she can spill the details on her crazy mother and we can figure out what is going on with her.


Christie and Huckabee seem like they would be the most fun; two guys who I am not supporting. Trump would be ok if his wife wasnt hanging around scowling at us while we played xbox all day. Each round of COD we'd play for de-gold leafing one of the items in the room.

Curious George said...

I would be an oak tree.

Steven said...

Drago: "What is this observation based upon precisely?"

It's based on the fact that "traditionalguy" has his mouth firmly attached to part of Trump's below-the-waist anatomy. I mean, Trump, just last night, called for us to make our military the biggest we've ever had. Which, if Trump knew anything about military history, he would know is a call for an increase in the size of our military by an order of magnitude, to get near its World War II size.

fivewheels said...

Candidates I feel like I could enjoy spending a day with, engaging in some activity and shooting the shit on non-political topics: Fiorina, Carson, Trump (not surprisingly, the non-politicians).

Candidates I could consider spending a day with only if I had the option to bail if and when they crossed the annoyance/boredom threshold: Christie, Cruz, Rubio, Paul.

The rest? No way.

fivewheels said...

Oh, yeah, the Democrats. I guess you could add Webb to the second category, or maybe the first. That's it.

fivewheels said...

Oops, Webb is out, right? Never mind.

bleh said...

Carson - seems like an all around nice guy, we would have to steer clear of religion and his kooky beliefs

Rand - you know he drinks and smokes, Aqua buddha

Everyone else would be insufferable. I don't understand the personal appeal of the Donald. He's such an arrogant jerk.

Bay Area Guy said...

Hillary - I'd like to challenge her, civilly, on what she believes and why. I get the impression she lives in a cocoon.

Original Mike said...

Cruz. He seems to have the quickest mind. Though I'd also like to go paddling with Meade and Bernie.

Michael K said...

"There is little worse than kidnapping a girl -- like Chelsea, say -- that no one wants to fuck."

Just remember, "for every beautiful woman, there is a guy who is tired of fucking her." Chelsea, of course, is a dog. McCain was right. Janet Reno was her father.

Carson would be interesting but maybe I just like neurosurgeons.

Sebastian said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sebastian said...

The policy-wonkish part of me would like to spend the day (well, a few hours) with . . . Bobby Jindal!

The paleocon-rightwinger part of me would enjoy spending the day (well, a few hours) with Ted Cruz. I can probably talk him down from that gold-standard thing.

But unlike AA, I would really be interested in spending a day with any one of them. They have had interesting lives, had to handle lots of issues unrelated to my life and career. I'm sure I would learn a lot, off camera.

Unless one of them pulls a Rouhani. That's a no no.

wildswan said...

Jeb Bush. I'd like to know how he got to the positions he is now holding. There's a disconnect from natural developments within the Republican party which is sort of hard to understand given all the people in his family who have risen in politics. Sometimes I think that he is fighting for his grandchildren; that one of them will rise to be president running on a set of issues which Job Bush is running on right now but which he isn't explaining or can't really explain the right way. The issues which will matter when this country is 30% Hispanic in 2030. The way the issues will be put. Something like that. (The Hispanics will not be genderfree-hysterical-thumbsucking-womenmen-Democrat-aborters. Be sure of that.)

Or maybe he is just out of touch.

madAsHell said...

Bernie is not like that. He makes noise.

I was acquainted with a fellow that was pursuing a career as a pilot. In order to build his hours, he would fly freight between various locations. The plane was not pressurized.

One night, his manifest included a corpse in a body bag. As he was gaining altitude, he started hearing a groaning noise from the corpse. The pressure inside the corpse was higher than the cabin pressure, and air passed through vocal chords. The pilot was completely un-nerved, and kept one eye looking for zombies in the cabin. Later, the pilot speculated that the ground crew had set him up.

That's kinda how I see Bernie.

Deirdre Mundy said...

I think Carson would be the easiest to hang out with for the day, because he's normal.

I'd like hanging w/ Jindal too, though, because he's smart and interesting.

Trump is that creepy guy who gloms onto you at a party and you have to find someone to be a fake boyfriend to get rid of him.

MathMom said...

Kasich. With a rolled-up newspaper hidden behind my back, so that I could whap him over the nose for being such a jerk at the debates. Then I'd go home and clean toilets the rest of the day.

The Godfather said...

I'd enjoy spending a day with Jeb, but it would have to be after he withdraws from the presidential race, because it would be embarassing to tell him I don't support his candidacy. He seems like a smart guy, with an interesting life story, and I bet he'd be easy for me to get along with. We have a little bit in common: I lived in Florida during his second term as governor, and my father knew Jeb's grandfather Prescott back in Connecticut.

It wouldn't be Trump. I've known quite a few real estate developers through my law practice; Trump's like the worst of them. It wouldn't be Dr. Ben; I honor and respect him, but I don't think I could stand a day with him. Not Hillary or Bernie, of course. Actually, any of the rest would be OK, but maybe for only half a day.

Rosalyn C. said...

Marco Rubio -- I hear he's a really big spender and have him take me boutique and gallery shopping in Miami. I'd also get a chance to find out why I don't like him.

Francisco D said...

I prefer Ted Cruz as the Republican candidate, but I would most like to spend a day with Ben Carson.

I am not sure he would be a good POTUS, but I am convinced that he is the most interesting candidate in the world.

Does he drink Dos Equis?

I am not Laslo.

Big Mike said...

I'd like to talk techie with Carly Fiorina, but I hear that Marco Rubio has a nice fishing boat down in Florida. Marco, my man, take us out where the marlin granders are biting and you have my vote for-evah!

William said...

In the Daily Mail, they had a photo spread of Trump's penthouse--or one of them. The place was really hideous and uncomfortable. All marble and gilt edges everywhere. It looked like one of Saddam's palaces. Nothing cosy or warm. I don't know if you should choose a President on the basis of their interior decorator, but Trump doesn't live in the pad of someone I could relate to.........Chrystie seems like the kind of guy I've known at some point in my life. I'm sure I could work with him. Huckabee and Paul also look like they're easy to be around......These aren't my first choices for Prez, but they look to be ok guys. As a general rule, I would advise against hanging around with alphas who want to be President. They've got other agendas than kicking back.

J. Farmer said...

@Michael K:

"Chelsea, of course, is a dog. McCain was right. Janet Reno was her father."

Really, what's wrong with you? What happened in your life to turn you into such a nasty, hateful person? I have huge criticisms of the Clinton's politics, but why exactly was it necessary for McCain to take an innocent child, who did not choose her parents, and cruelly comment publicly about her appearance? Why are you such a mean-spirited dick?

Do you not have enough confidence in your actual arguments that you actually have to resort to this kind of sub-schoolyard level rhetoric? You and I disagree politically on quite a lot. How impressed would you be if I reacted to a point you made by calling you an old, fat slob? Would you like to post pictures of your wife or children during the awkward teenage years so we can all gawk at them?

Michael K said...

"Really, what's wrong with you? What happened in your life to turn you into such a nasty, hateful person?"

Meeting you.

Just a joke, like the other comment. The left has no humor. Thanks for proving it.

David said...

I'll play, and it's Trump in a landslide.

The Cracker Emcee Refulgent said...

Yeah, Trump. He may be obnoxious but he's the closest thing to a regular Joe in the whole lot.

narciso said...

I don't get the Chelsea hate, sure she's the daughter of scam artists, who married into a family of scam artists, and now fronts the grift, but you can't avoid that,

Theranter said...

Trump. It'd be fun, very interesting, easy to get into fine restaurants, and I could pitch my startup!

J. Farmer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
J. Farmer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
robother said...

For a guy, Trump, hands down. I lived in NYC for 3 years, worked with various Wall Street types, and The Donald is my favorite kind of New Yawk guy. (First impression, like every bullshitting sexual conquistador I knew in college, until you go to a party and he walks in with the first 10 you've ever met--oh my god, he's for real!) Hell on lawyers (I was one of those) including his own, but outside the negotiating room, no one you'd rather eat, drink, party or just watch a baseball game with.

Michael K said...

"First, I'm not on the left, but that's the typically lazy kind of response I've come to expect from you"

For a dumb fuck, you type well. Why don't you look at my blog and see my family ? I don't make any secret of who I am like some leftists I could mention.

Chelsea is a privileged young women who is making the most of her parents' criminal conspiracy. Her $10 million apartment for one. The old McCain joke is funny and she is a nasty piece of work. At least Carter sent his kid to public school in DC even if she had a platoon of SS with her.

If you are too stupid to find it I'll help you.

Here, does that help ? Now you can post obscene comments like other leftists have done. I am used to you twerps.

Freeman Hunt said...

Carson, definitely. Talk about medicine all day.

narciso said...

I do recall when an offspring of a former political figure was assaulted last fall, a phony account was put forth, and when the truth came out there wasn't an apology, here and in many places,

Michael K said...

Now you, big tough guy.

I am just amused at these lefty keyboard commandoes.

narciso said...

going back to an earlier attack:

http://www.arkdiscovery.com/joseph.htm

JackWayne said...

Chelsea had to get tips from Rodney Dangerfield on how to have friends.

Sammy Finkelman said...

I'd want to spend time with someone I liked somewhat whose campaign I would want to improve, or maybe someone whom I'd want to get a closer look at.

J. Farmer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
narciso said...

well McCain has often been a jackass, despite the glowing portraits in Vogue, she's a very average looking person, I mean the unmitigated hatred from the likes of Zurawik of the Sun,

J. Farmer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Birkel said...

J Farmer is not on the Left, bless his heart.
Sometimes I come into comments and see comedy gold.

Tell another one,J Farmer.

J. Farmer said...

@Birkel:

"Tell another one,J Farmer."

Sure. You know nothing about my political orientation. You're long on sarcasm, short on facts.

Guildofcannonballs said...

The conditions of the situation would determine my choice, most importantly if:

1) I can be bribed by the campaigns directly or 501(c) 3's or whatever for the commercial boost of the recorded day to the campaign and had exclusive rights to edit any footage to be used by the candidate before any editing process could begin on their behalf involving my image or name but not the candidate,

or

2) Corporate sponsorship such as a casino in Atlantic City or someplace in New Orleans or Florida with a 2 year contract for up to 4 or less celebrity appearances per year at per diems and expenses matching their most exclusive corporate client's average prime-season rates plus 20% and 7 figures rock star consulting services exclusively guaranteed total with no rights to any footage retained myself.

Birkel said...

"How dare you criticize somebody's looks, you fat, bald, internet tough guy who is old and ready to die.stay on substance like I do."

--J Farmer, paraphrased

Guildofcannonballs said...

The paradigm for this sort of thing would be "24" starring Keifer Sutherland, is my thinking here.

"A day is a unit of time. In common usage, it is an interval equal to 24 hours.[1] It also can mean the consecutive period of time during which the Sun is above the horizon, also known as daytime. The period of time during which the Earth completes one rotation with respect to the Sun is called a solar day.[2][3]" - Wikipedia

J. Farmer said...

@Birkel:

Congratulations on picking up on that subtle-as-a-knee-to-the-groin irony of mine. Gold star! You see, I'm making use of that tactic in order to comment on it. Care to find a single example outside the framework of this discussion where I discuss someone's physical appearance or state because I disagree with them politically. Go look. I'll wait.

Guildofcannonballs said...

Etymology[edit]
The term comes from the Old English dæg, with its cognates such as dagur in Icelandic, Tag in German, and dag in Norwegian, Danish, Swedish and Dutch. All of them from the Indo-European root dyau which explains the similarity with Latin dies though the word is known to come from the Germanic branch. As of October 17, 2015, day is the 205th most common word in US English,[6] and the 210th most common in UK English.[6]

J. Farmer said...

Not that it really matters, but I chose to delete the posts I made that involved personal attacks on other people's appearances. I had convinced myself at the time of writing them that I was doing so to make a point, but in retrospect felt rather shameful and embarrassed by them. It's a prurient instinct that we all possess, and it cannot be eternally sublimated. But we should try as much as possible to resist it.

@Michael K:

I stand by my criticism that you too often make the political personal, and I do believe that you (like many others) have a tendency to unleash cruelty against people that you disagree with politically. But it was really a display of poor character on my part to level personal invective your way to try to make a point. I apologize.

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty confident that I would find it least worthwhile to talk with Trump. Which is not to say I'd expect any of them to be all that interesting.

eric said...

Trump, he would probably give me a helicopter ride.

Mid-Life Lawyer said...

Christie. He loves the Dallas Cowboys and Bruce Springsteen. He's smart and funny. Fiorina next.

policraticus said...

Christie. He is my governor, we both went to the University of Delaware, we both like to eat, we have a fair amount in common. I'm an Eagles fan, so that would be a good debate.

sinz52 said...

Rand Paul.

His iconoclastic views on foreign policy I find quite refreshing, even though I don't necessarily agree with some of them. But I would sure love to argue with him about it over a pizza and beer. It would remind me of my college days long ago.

MacMacConnell said...

Cruz, a politician not satisfied with being a wonk that pulls the levers of a corrupt system, but one that wants to reform it.

Unknown said...

I think a day of golf with the Donald.

MountainMan said...

I would pick Cruz. But I would much prefer a day with Michael K.

Rusty said...

Bernie Sanders.
But only if he talked and acted like Larry David.



Come to think of it.
I'd rather hang out with Larry David.

Peter said...

Ben Carson, of course. He may be a crappy candidate, but he appears to be an interesting person and of the field would be the most interesting and enjoyable companion for a day.

lgv said...

Trump. A whole day might be too much. He's my 7th favorite candidate, but we could helicopter to one of his golf courses, enjoy a round of golf, a round of good scotch, a cigar. Plus, I'd like to hear about some of the deals he did and didn't do. It's always the deals you didn't do that are the most interesting.

jr565 said...

Id spend it with Ben Carson. He seems genuinely thoughtful and soft spoken. Plus he's a neurosurgeon. Probably has a lot of interesting stories.
I would have said Trump but something tells me if I started hanging with him he'd find more important people to hang with and leave me in the lurch.

Holding My Nose said...

Dr. Ben Carson hands down.

MadisonMan said...

I'd also pick Jindal -- if we could be in New Orleans all day. He must know some great restaurants.

MadisonMan said...

Who would you place my Mother-in-Law with? I'd give her Hillary Clinton (she's a big fan). I think MIL's eyes would be opened. Then the next day MIL can hang with Carly.

RonF said...

Trump. I figure the food and booze would be first-rate.

bbkingfish said...

Trump. I don't think a day with Trump would be boring. And also, what RonF said.

Michael K said...


@Michael K:

I stand by my criticism that you too often make the political personal, and I do believe that you (like many others) have a tendency to unleash cruelty against people that you disagree with politically. But it was really a display of poor character on my part to level personal invective your way to try to make a point. I apologize.


Accepted.I guess this means you are not the guy who hacked my Facebook account last night and sent stuff to my daughters.

I do think that late in the day, if I have been sipping wine, I may cross a line I would rather not. "Words over wine."

However, I do not respect Chelsea Clinton who has followed eagerly in her parents criminal footsteps.

Janet Reno is probably sterile anyway.